Choosing and Being the Right Spouse - ensign
How do you create a marriage made in heaven? This article examines the elements of successful relationships. Remember your first date with that special someone? The key is to understand your spouse's viewpoint and agree on the best way to move forward, which may involve giving it some. No, marriages aren't made in heaven rather they are made on earth If a two successful people marry, their egos may collide in a fight The key is how you deal with it. for granted. Need to make your relationship a priority. 10/ 10 True love in both dating relationships and marriages are not about. Ten Keys to Successful Dating and Marriage Relationships Our marriages and families are built upon heavenly concepts and principles, not.
But neither one of us discussed our thoughts and feelings; we would get full of anger and neither one of us would talk. Good family environments and family relationships tend to lead to good quality marriages by the children; poor family environments and family relationships often foreshadow poor marriages by the children from these homes. Young adults from divorced families, for example, may experience some depression and anger and have trouble trusting or committing to others as a result of the trauma of parental divorce.
Whether their parents divorced or not, some individuals may have been exposed to poor models of communication and conflict resolution in their families. Children from families that were emotionally cold and distant, chaotic, dangerous, unpredictable, detached, full of conflict, or where addictions or violence were chronic problems may need special help in overcoming such an upbringing.
Fortunately, however, our backgrounds do not have to control the outcome of our lives or our marriages. President McKay also said: Morally speaking, we can carve the very atmosphere in which we live. The very scriptures that warn of wickedness being passed on unto the third and fourth generation also show the way out of a troubled family background.
Doctrine and Covenants The Book of Mormon is also full of examples of how to deal with parental influences. The story of the Lamanites who responded to the teaching of Ammon and his brethren is a powerful example of a people who overcame generations of wicked traditions.
In brief, the Book of Mormon teaches us that we can overcome these negative effects by having faith in the Lord, allowing ourselves to be taught by inspired leaders, learning the lessons of the scriptures, suffering in patience the afflictions that parents may have brought upon us, and repenting of any of the unrighteous habits and behaviors we may have picked up see Mosiah 1: It is important to have family and friends on our side and supportive of the upcoming marriage, Elder Richard L.
Evans —71 of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles advised. The Right Time President Hinckley offered this counsel about timing: I do not speak so much to the young women as to the young men whose prerogative and responsibility it is to take the lead in this matter. Look for a choice companion, one you can love, honor, and respect, and make a decision. But jumping into marriage too quickly can also be a problem.
President Lee advised that a young man not think of marriage until he is able to take care of a family of his own, to be independent. Making the Decision After thoughtfully and prayerfully considering all of these factors, we must be sure the decision we make is based on inspiration, not infatuation or desperation.
- October 2018
- Some Factors to Consider
- Recently On Relationships
As we seek a spiritual confirmation, we need to keep at least five things in mind. First, we must be worthy to receive the inspiration we need. Second, we must understand the balance between agency and inspiration.
After praying and waiting for an answer, I got more frustrated and gave up. That was when an impression came to me: The decision to marry Becky always made sense and felt right. Always be open and straightforward with each other. Too often we may respond to tensions by clamming up or by taking a walk. A young wife in the southwest corner of Salt Lake County asked me to talk with her husband. He just walks out the door. He can go on for days or even a week or two without saying a word.
Let me work it out by myself. What is marriage if it is not sharing and helping one another through crises? Keep the door to your heart open. The times when we shut others out are often the times when we need their help the most.
Of course we need times of privacy, to think alone. Of course we need time to pray and to meditate. And we should understand and respect these needs in others. However, we should never be inconsiderate or unappreciative of a concerned husband or wife who is trying to help at a time of trouble and discouragement.
Even when cheating has occurred, we must be willing, under most circumstances, to accept their true repentance. Thousands of marriages have survived the most critical problems and have been successful only because godly sorrow for sin was followed by Christlike forgiveness.
A woman was referred to my office for a blessing for the restoration of her health. She had been ill for seven years. She had had exploratory surgery three times, had been in the hospital a number of times, and had switched doctors more often than annually.
And I declined to give her a blessing when the Spirit said there was nothing wrong physically. Brothers and sisters, you can imagine what an awkward position I found myself in, having to say no. She had not been pleased with his behavior and had carried with her a scarred heart, emotions that had been disrupted and confused, and she was bitter.
Now wait just a minute, Elder Pinnock. About ten days later the telephone rang. I have thought a great deal about it since then, and I believe that is your problem. Confiding Only in the Bishop or Branch President Ninth, remember never to turn to a third party in time of marital trouble except to your bishop or branch president. In sensitive and inspired ways he will direct you to a competent counselor if that is what is needed.
Someone is always ready and eager to consult a hurting wife or husband, and when marriage partners have no one to talk with at home, unfortunately, too often they seek a friend elsewhere. And that, dear brothers and sisters, is where almost all adultery has its origin. It can happen in the neighborhood, in a ward choir, at the office, or anywhere else. Secret affairs begin innocently enough just by talking about mutual hurts, but then comes a dependency period that too often ends in transferring loyalty and affection, followed by adultery.
Never ever, never ever, confide your marriage troubles to a third party, no, not even to your closest friend. He or she may be the first to tell your troubles to another, becoming the one to hurt you most severely. Lean on the Savior and rely upon your bishop and your stake president. Remember that because, as the years quickly come and go, there will be stressful times when you will need to talk to someone.
Remember who it should be. The system which the Lord has given us is simple. Having Fun Tenth, have clean, wholesome fun during your dating years and retain the same joy in marriage.
God intends for us to find joy in life. Man is that he might have joy. Most marriages begin with joy, and those that succeed retain it.
keys to a godly relationship
Last Thanksgiving we went up to Bear Lake. We have a little farm home there. My wife and I began a tickling contest.
I am a world-class tickler. I am one of the greatest ticklers that has ever lived. Well, as we were laughing and giggling, in came the children. Soon they joined in and we had a great time. When a marriage loses its happiness, it becomes weak and vulnerable.
Find a happy home, and you will find a joyful couple at the helm. Husbands and wives who no longer laugh and play together are losing their fondness for each other and perhaps even their capacity to stay together. True love includes a joyful, almost childlike quality. In other words, live it up—righteously. It is a gloomy moment in the history of our country. Not in the lifetime of most men has there been so much grave and deep apprehension. Never has the future seemed so uncalculable as at this time.
The domestic situation is in chaos. Our dollar is weak throughout the world. Prices are so high as to be utterly impossible.
The political caldron seethes and bubbles with uncertainty. Russia hangs as usual like a cloud, dark and silent, upon the horizon.
Ten Keys to Successful Dating and Marriage Relationships
It is a solemn moment. Of our troubles, no man can see the end. Anticipation LOTS of it. Your mind replayed every moment of the date more times than reruns of The Brady Bunch. Thinking of her made your heart pound so loudly that you wondered if others could hear it. And then it finally happened. What Makes Relationships Last? Some basic elements of a successful relationship include sharing common interests, communicating on a regular basis, displaying appreciation and affection, embracing intimacy, and showing real empathy.
Honesty, trust, respect, and fidelity are also critical ingredients. While best intentions are all well and good, your daily actions form the foundation of any successful relationship. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character.
Relationships: A Marriage Made in Heaven
And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny! Actions become habits, which ultimately determine the destiny of your relationship. Here are some positive actions worthy of your consideration: Be mindful that your focus should shift from me to us and from mine to ours.
Accept your spouse for who he or she is, rather than the person you want him or her to be. Practice active listening, thoughtful speaking, and constructive dialogue.